


Am I Ugly?

by LukePoiz



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Conversations, Demisexual Raphael Santiago, Established Simon Lewis/Raphael Santiago, Insecure Simon Lewis, M/M, Raphael Santiago Speaks Spanish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-12 13:28:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19946920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LukePoiz/pseuds/LukePoiz
Summary: Simon looked down these days, sad, in a way Raphael was yet to see him.He was hurting, and the leader's heart broke a little bit more each time he saw him.Till it just became too painful to watch.





	Am I Ugly?

**Author's Note:**

> If only was this productive and motivated at classes *sighs*
> 
> Enjoy ~

_Simon looked down these days, sad, in a way Raphael was yet to see him._

_He was hurting, and the leader's heart broke a little bit more each time he saw him._

_Till it just became too painful to watch._

* * *

**_"Simon? We gotta talk,"_** the named was taken out of his thoughts at the call of his name.

 _ **"About?"**_ , softly replied Lewis, as he tried to focus on the other vampire in front of him.

 ** _"You. You and whatever is going on in that mind of yours,"_** replied Santiago partially satisfied with having Simon's attention.

 _ **"Me? I don't know what ar-"**_ , started Simon just to be abruptly interrupted by the older, _**"Please, cariño. I know that something is troubling you. I can tell, so please, just let me help,"**_ as a worried expression flashed on his face.

Simon was both confused and bewildered, Raphael was right, there was something, something he wasn't able to stop thinking about, his insecurities were coming back to bit him.

After some time, under the expecting gaze of Raphael, Simon finally decided to let it out, so he asked, _ **"Do you think I'm ugly?"**_

Raphael's expression passed through various stages for it to end on dull disbelief. Maybe he heard him wrong. _**"Excuse me?"**_ , he asked, confusion evident in his voice.

Simon shifted uncomfortably in his spot, avoiding visual contact, yet, he tried again, **_"Am I ugly? Do you find me unattractive?"_**

Hurt, that was what Raphael could easily hear as Lewis spoke, Santiago was left wondering why would such a beautiful person like him ask that kind of question.

 _ **"You're the most beautiful being my immortal eyes had ever laid on,"**_ said the older, as his hand rested on Simon's cheek.

At his words, a tiny curve plastered on Lewis' lips for a moment, but then it was quickly replaced with a frown.

 ** _"Then why you haven't tried to do anything with me beyond kissing? It's not like I haven't tried to do so,"_** there was something new, the hurt from before now had a name: the feel of rejection.

Simon felt Raphael didn't want him, and it made sense. The shirtless walks, that time at the pool, the flirty remarks, it all was there for him to take a chance. Was cause they stopped a few days ago, just in sync with the swing of mood in Simon.

It became clear now, Simon gave up. Panic rushed through Raphael, as he feared the worst.

 _ **"Please, please, tell me that I did tell you I am demisexual and, that I have a hard time reading into things like those because of it,"**_ spoke an apologetic Santiago.

Simon opened his mouth to reply to him and then closed it without saying a word. Raphael had his answer. _"Soy un idiota soy."_ , he mumbled for himself more than anything.

A much-needed conversation came next. Both took the chance to clear up misunderstandings, as they should have, a long time ago.

When the talking and its accompanying embarrassment were out of the way, concerning Santiago, there was only one thing left to do.

As a sly grin decorated his face, Raphael said, _**"You know, Simon, if you were that horny for me, you could have just asked, trust me, it would have been a pleasure for me to accept."**_

If Simon could, he would have died again.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this.
> 
> I'm writing more steamy things about those two on this series, [Simon's Doubt by Luke Poiz](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1426885), feel free to check it out ~


End file.
